Dating events are becoming increasingly popular amongst single Christians in London.
The ‘casual culture’ of dating apps and the challenges of dating in church have led organisers such as Bored of Dating Apps (BODA) and Genesis Dating to turn to their own devices, hosting events across the capital and beyond.
Jessica Hope Evans founded BODA after becoming disillusioned with dating apps.
“I just didn’t feel like my personality was made for the apps and how fast and furious they are, and how much they champion casual culture,” said Evans.
She hosted what she thought would be a one-off event in January 2022, but 200 people turned up.
The success led Evans to leave her journalism career to develop the business, branching out into Christian events this year.
She added: “As a Christian, I’ve always felt really uncomfortable with judging a profile and then being like, okay, should I pursue that?
“As Christians we haven’t got too many avenues to explore getting to know someone.
“I think our events are incredible because you’re actually giving people a chance, and there’s that accountability in the room.
“I feel like it is just a really healthy way to date as opposed to human shopping.”
Evans also feels that the church doesn’t always get dating right.
She explained that by prioritising students, families and newlyweds, single adults feel left behind and unsure of where they stand.
Evans added: “When there isn’t really anything for single people, by default it makes you think that you’re doing something wrong. So what’s been really important for me throughout my Christian journey has been to make a space that genuinely feels really fun.”
The awkwardness of dating in church is a sentiment echoed by other Christians.
“When you’re at church, you don’t necessarily know who’s single, you don’t know who’s open to dating, and it’s also not the appropriate place to be chatting up somebody,” said Jacob Hughes-Hallett, the founder of Genesis Dating.
Whilst attending a Christian dating event in August, 28-year-old Hughes-Hallett met high school teacher Dilan Alexander.
Also fed up with dating apps and feeling that dating is awkward to engage with at church, the duo decided to create a group chat to reunite the single Christians they had met that night and invite their own single friends too.
Within a week, 150 people had joined the WhatsApp chat, and the pair decided to set up an official event in October.
Set over three floors, it featured a ‘no phone policy’ with attendees encouraged to place their phones in zip-lock bags.
“I really liked Genesis because I liked that there were activities through the different floors,” said attendee Trevor Mak.
Oluwatofunmi Onaeko, 32, also attended the event in the hope of finding a partner.
“Numbers are quite off in church, there’s often a lot more women than men. I think sometimes it leads to quite bad behaviour in dating on both sides,” said Onaeko.
“Sometimes it feels like dating in church doesn’t echo the core of Christianity.”
Hughes-Hallett argues that in-person events combat this issue of accountability.
He said: “You’re kept accountable by the fact that you’re in a group of people, in the same community of the church in London.
“Talking about dating in a church context can feel taboo because it feels inappropriate to be talking about dating when you’re at a prayer gathering, because you’re there to worship the Lord.”
The latest census showed 41% of Londoners identified as Christian. In-person dating events are creating a third space, away from the apps and the church, for Christians to find love.
Featured Image Credit: Caldwell Campbell Photography
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